indecorum

ARABIA, March 31 (Reuters) – The U.S. Navy today announced that it has released a senior Al Qaeda terrorist after questioning him extensively for 27 days while he was held prisoner aboard an aircraft carrier in the Arabian Sea. In a humanitarian gesture, the terrorist was given $50 and a white Ford Fairlane automobile when released from custody. The attached photo shows the terrorist on his way home just after being released by the Navy.

I apologize in advance for violating the “funny” requirement of this page. But as a veteran, as an American, as a fucking human being, I’m so pissed off about this.

Some perspective....

The Famous French Pocket Knife, not to be confused by the never before used version the Swiss make.

Check this shiznit out.

Editor’s Note: Saved from remote site because those bastards used a lot of popups. Moral: use popups, loose content!

The US government has a new website, http://www.ready.gov/. It’s another attempt at scare mongering in the style of the old “duck and cover” advice after WWII.

The fun thing is that these pictures are so ambiguous they could mean anything! Here are a few interpretations.
Would you like to know more? »

Rah rah you can…ah Whatever (Powerpoint)

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Oh Yeah!

On a lighter note:

Boys – I strongly suggest you go see Old School immediately.

There is nothing – and I mean nothing – that tops the tranquilizer gun scene.

The Military History of France:

• Gallic Wars – Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2,000 years of French history, France is conquered by, of all things, an Italian. Hundred Years War – Mostly lost, saved at last by a female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare: “France’s armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman.”
• Italian Wars – Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. Wars of Religion – France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots
• Thirty Years War – France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.
• War of Devolution – Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.
• The Dutch War – Tied.
• War of the Augsburg League / King William’s War / French and Indian War – Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Francophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.
• War of the Spanish Succession – Lost. The war also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.
• American Revolution – In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as “de Gaulle Syndrome,” and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare: “France only wins when America does most of the fighting.”
• French Revolution – Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.
• The Napoleonic Wars – Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.
• The Franco-Prussian War – Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk frat boy to France’s ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.
• World War I – Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it’s like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn’t call her “Fraulein.” Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.
• World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel song.
• War in Indochina – Lost. French forces plead sickness, take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu.
• Algerian Rebellion – Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a Western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare: “We can always beat the French.” This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish,
  Vietnamese and Esquimaux.
• War on Terrorism – France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald’s.

The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be “Can we count on the French?” but, rather, “How long until France collapses?”

Watch this RIGHT NOW….

The full version of the Terry Tate Reebok commercial. My favorite part? The slow-motion run-down at the end…

Editor’s Note: Remote file, watch it while you can.