Games

A penguin walks into a bar, and asks the bartender if he has any plums. The bartender, confused, tells the penguin that no, his bar doesn’t serve plums. The penguin thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the penguin returns, and again repeats his request for plums. Again, the bartender tells him that, no, the bar does not serve plums, has never served plums, and, furthermore, will never serve plums. The penguin, a little ruffled, thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the penguin returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender begins to yell: “Listen, penguin! This is a bar! We do not serve plums! If you ever ask for plums again, I will nail your stupid penguin beak to the bar!” The penguin is silent for a moment, and then asks, ”Do you have any nails?” Confused, the bartenders says “No.”

“Good!” says the penguin. “Then do you have any plums?”

——–

At which point the bartender wished he could play: Penguin Baseball

Remember the days of cutting out snowflakes?

Well, just got this URL for some fun addictive flash! Have a great time… Give it a try.

Shoot your Longbow…to maim badly.

Giving the Finger – Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers. Without the middle finger it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow and therefore be incapable of fighting in the future. This famous weapon was made of the native English Yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as “plucking the yew” (or “pluck yew”).

Editor’s Note: You shouldn’t believe everything you read on the web.

I’m sure that this has been out there a while, but I stumbled across this simple game just this weekend and Cara and I have been semi-addicted ever since.

If you missed the reference, the history of Trogdor can be found in a previous musing.

In the spirit of the Atari console games we were raised on, I submit Trogdor the game. Don’t get sworded, and enjoy!

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, “Whatcha doing, Tim?”

“My goldfish died,” replied the boy tearfully, without looking up. “And I’ve just buried him.”

The neighbor was concerned. “That’s an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn’t it?”

Tim patted down the last heap of earth then replied, “That’s because he’s inside your cat.”

A quick chuckle, now try to make your fish bigger than all the rest by eating everything smaller than you.

Post your scores in the comments below.

So, I just had an email forwarded to me that casually mentions that you can look up people’s driver’s licence on-line with picture and everything! Jesus!

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want this information out there available for anyone to see, so help me let people know what’s going on so we can get a petition started to shut this site down.

For now, jump on here as quickly as you can, look up your own driver’s licence and when it comes up click the ‘Please remove me from this database’ button on the bottom right.

Driver’s Licence Database